Things that are bullshit in Greek mythology-based fiction stories:
TREATING ROMAN AND GREEK GODS AS THE SAME OR EQUIVALENT: fuuuuuck you there were many, many differences between the Greek and Roman Gods, your stupid little middle school class lied. Apollo and Apollon are nigh identical but basically everyone else is very different. Athena is not Minerva, Artemis is not Diana, Ares is not Mars. Haides doesn’t even HAVE a similar Roman deity.
Pluto as a Roman deity: yo Pluto/Plouton wasn’t Roman Pluto was another GREEK name for the GREEK god Haides (who you call Hades) Pluto/Plouton is what you call him when you’re talking about him being the God of riches and treasure like how you sometimes call Apollo Phoebus.
Apollo as the sun/driver of the sun chariot: That’s Helios, Helios and Apollo weren’t consistently syncretized into the same deity until long, long after ancient Greece. Don’t be historically inaccurate. Only assholes are historically inaccurate. Note: also goes for Artemis as the moon. Selene is the moon.
Kronos as monstrous lava monster demon thing: the Titans were always depicted as beautiful humanoid beings, just as the Gods were.
Ares as villain/asshole/thug/misogynist/shitty parent: being in charge of an unpopular subject matter does not make a God the scum of the earth, or abusive, or neglectful. Ares was particularly notable for being a devoted father to his offspring and is one of the few Gods without a rape story. Longer explanation of this subject here.
Aphrodite as slut: no, really, fuck you. Fuck you and everything you love. Fuck your horse, fuck your family, fuck your ancestors, fuck everything you’ve ever touched.
Haides as the devil/the Underworld as Hell: the Greek afterlife was for most deceased mortals a relatively peaceful eternity, without fire and torment and misery. Haides was considered a God to be respected for his power and solemnity, but that does not equate to considering him evil or terrible.
Hera as a jealous bitch: yo Hera was one of the most widely worshiped and beloved deities in the pantheon. Stop taking the Iliad as holy writ, Homer had a noted bias atypical to the traditional mythology.
anyone but Bellerophon or Zeus using Pegasus/more than one Pegasus in your story/anyone but Theseus killing the Minotaur/anyone but Perseus killing Medusa/anyone but Hercules killing the Boar, Lion, Hydra, etc/Perseus as son of any god but Zeus: dude read a book some time y’all need to get your stories straight Greek heroes aren’t interchangeable also fuck that Percy Jackson son of Poseidon bullshit you are being a moron. Also, Pegasus, singular. One. Solo. Pegasus is an individual “person.” There are not “pegasi”. That’s like saying Zeuses. Or Athenas. Or Poseidons.
The entire contents of the Clash of the Titans films: just stop. Please. Stop.
other Gods being able to defeat Zeus: yo Zeus once demolished a rebellion by the other Gods and is known to be more powerful than the other Olympians combined.
Stories set in modern times whose plots rely on pretending modern pagans don’t exist: don’t give me this “I HAVE TO CLIMB OLYMPUS TO CONTACT THE GODS” bullshit I have three fucking shrines in my bedroom alone
Hekate with kids or as an old woman: virgin goddess, guys, virgin goddess.
Prometheus as hating humans: listen asshole Prometheus was tortured for millenia for how much he cared about humans don’t be a dick to Prometheus do you hear me I will cut a bitch
Hermes the meanie trickster bully: yo Hermes was called the Friend of Man just because he’s a trickster doesn’t make him malicious
Athena with a ton of kids: VIRGIN. GODDESS. Oh and you want to trot out that “but they’re BRAIN children!” claim? When Athena was born from Zeus’ head, it’s because he ATE her mother. If you’re going to claim Athena’s children were brain babies I want to see your book mention her eating humans. Go on. I dare you.
Artemis the man-hater: yo she’s the goddess of hunting who do you think did the most hunting OH RIGHT MEN
Dionysus as some old fat alcoholic dude: dude this is a sculpture of Dionysus what is wrong with you people
Bonus for the Egyptian pantheon: calling Egyptian gods by Greek names (Thoth instead of Djehuty, Anubis instead of Anpu, etc).
((if you reblog, PLEASE REBLOG AS TEXT, NOT AS LINK. Go to the gear symbol in the upper right when you reblog and click text. That will stop your pesky auto-truncate problem. Sorry, that just drives me nuts))
OMG ! I didn’t know that last about the Egyptian. Sorry : ((((((
okay some of these things I agree with as a classics major who wishes for an popular accurate understanding of various mythologies.
But a lot of these just stink of fussy, petulant pedantry and a “no fun allowed” attitude.
They’re stories and legends. Understand their historical context and get the understanding of them right, but otherwise if you want to change things up and invent new stories, personalities, etc go the fuck ahead. I promise the actual Greeks and Romans wouldn’t have minded.
Nah son not the same thing. You would be pretty annoyed if some guy who watched crime shows tried to tell you he knew as much as you about being an attorney and the law.
I get the same problem as OP, dumbasses who watched Marvel movies and think that they know more about my gods than I do
I get that part. That’s not what I have problems with.
It’s the “no changes or new creations are legitimately allowed. This is how they were perceived historically (and even that is questionable given the vast amount of material lost to us) and that is how they must be for all time.”
I get someone thinking they know everything by buying into popular misconceptions, but some people want to be creative about it and aren’t concerned with being absolutely faithful. They want to make a good story with some characters based on but not slavishly loyal to the original ones.
Yeah I get what you mean, but a lot of those works who borrows from the mythology are often plain lazy and disrespectful. But I don’t see a problem per se with works which are inspired by mythology, for example LOTR or even the Thor comics (not the movie) are really good. I think that the problem is that those who use and misinterpret the gods alter their character for their story yet try to say that they are the same as the ones of the myths.
Yeah that’s my thing.
Say it’s either one or the other. Either keep it traditional or outright say it’s a new interpretation. Don’t try to do both cuz then that’s not only wrong but disingenuous.
Had a guy get snippy with me when I mused of a story with Chronus (Zeus’s father) being syncratic with Cronus (God of time). Because I find the analogy of Zeus conquering time fitting. Though having upfront acknowledged this wasn’t classically accurate: No Fun Allowed.
folks be grouchy
Hera was a jealous hoe (rightfully so) but come on, shes basically that type who won’t leave their bf/husbands cheating ass. She doesn’t even take her anger out on Zeus, she takes it out on any woman unlucky enough to catch Zeus’s eye or any bastard child of Zeus. Like Hercules killed his family because of that bitch.
Obscure Fandoms 